I wasn’t allowed to link to this on Friday, but now that I am no longer employed by G/O Media, I can post this as a “civilian”. This is my new baby, and you can subscribe FOR FREE! (The majority of the content will be free, but the incredibly NSFW stuff will be behind a paywall.)
Read more

Thank you! I feel very lucky I got off as easy as I did. Thank god for modern medicine.  Read more

I’m doing MUCH better! To be honest, I really only felt “sick” for two whole days; the rest of the time I had waves of crippling exhaustion. Today is the best I’ve had so far. Decent energy, and only mildly tired.  Read more

I love the surrealist aspect of Noel and Matt. (See my recap of Biscuit Week.) Like I said, this show is so far past jumping the shark, and I crave the chaos they bring. We’re through the looking glass now, baby! It’s madness, all of it! Read more

I always loved Giuseppe, but if we were friends in person, he’d definitely the type whose balls I’d be busting all the time. I grew up Italian in Brooklyn, and it’s what we do. In fact, the more you like your friends, the more shit you give them. It’s what keeps my marriage together! Read more

I want to watch a show where they drive around Europe on a motorcycle with a sidecar. Read more

I will gladly leave my husband if that’s the case.  Read more

Does it really matter who won? They’re all stars now. Everyone’s a winner! Read more

Like I said, I have enough material to write a book. These people have been such a blessing.  Read more

You don’t kiss the spatula, you suffer the consequences.  Read more

GUYS! YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE ME CRY!!!

But yeah, to Giuseppe -- you can tell Paul wanted him to win for a few episodes, but tbh it really didn’t matter. Everyone was the best. Especially Lizzie. Read more

I like freezing them individually, then popping them in the microwave for a minute or two for dessert.  Read more

I love hearing this so much! Thanks for letting me know. :) Read more

You can! Read more

I need douchebags to make fun of! Otherwise I need to write about sad, terrifying things that give me nightmares, like climate change and Burger King.  Read more

Find me someone else this spectacularly craptastic to make fun of.  Read more

Salt Bae is proof that there is no god.  Read more

I prefer not to think of what I’ve written as “clickbait.” Instead, think of it as “Giving the internet an opportunity to rip into Salt Bae.” Read more

Because he’s being sexy.  Read more

Sentient Bernie is the funniest thing I’ve ever read about him that I haven’t personally wrote. Kudos to you, good sir! Read more