8 Shrek-Inspired Foods You Definitely Forgot About

As if Twinkies don’t already seem artificial enough, Shrek’s marketing team partnered with Hostess to fill the Armageddon-ready pastry with a radioactive shade of green. “Same great taste!” the box promises us. But maybe that’s the problem: If you’re gonna go that green, why not mess with the flavor to match while you’re at it? What could have been an innovative new treat was instead primed for NSFW jokes about the “ogre green creamy filling.”

When Shrek Forever Ever After came out in 2010, Chicago-based candy company Spangler (makers of Dum Dums, Bit-O-Honey, and Circus Peanuts) jumped at the opportunity to create a whole new treat dubbed the “Ogrehead.” In reality these are just green marshmallows, but they do go the extra mile and make the flavor match the color—unfortunately, that flavor is “swamp apple.” Want to know what that tastes like? For just $32 a “vintage” bag of the stuff can be yours over on eBay.

Without Shrek, we never would have had Heinz EZ Squirt ketchup, and for that we salute him. (Just one more contribution to the culture that has kept Shrek in a place of honor in our society for so long.) When the first movie in the franchise came out, Heinz released its Blastin’ Green ketchup with Shrek front and center on the label—the company sold more than 20 million bottles in just two years. As recently as December of 2021, this was another relic that was posted on eBay with an asking price of nearly $200. The listing is now gone, and we can only hope that means one lucky Shrek super fan is preserving it for years to come.

This “Shrek-ified” Kids Cuisine meal is one of the few things that you might still be able to buy (at least, I was able to add it to my online shopping cart on the Weis Markets website). Some versions of this treat came with swamp pudding or ogre cookies promising to turn kids’ tongues green, while others offered up prizes if your meal came in a green tray—consider it Shrek’s version of the golden ticket.

For Your Entertainment still sells its own Shrek-inspired creations—along with the bright-green Sour Swamp Soda (which is apple, not swamp flavored, don’t worry!), it also offers Donkey Waffles waffle mix and Dragon Salsa Verde Hot Sauce. A highlight of these products is the charming original illustration of each character featured on the label, a welcome reprieve from some of the more grotesque interpretations that exist on the internet (I beg of you, do not Google).

We all know that Shrek loves his swamp, and these Nestle pops were made to look like they were dunked right in.

Each frozen popsicle featured two flavors, like a Bomb Pop missing a layer, and were inexplicably shaped like crescent moons and stars. Nestle gets the most points on this one for keeping the names of the flavors on theme, even if they don’t sound entirely appetizing: Shrek Ogre Cherry, Donkey Berry, Sour Puss & Boots Orange (even though the character is Puss in Boots), and Fiona Princess Punch.

Ogre Os are a cereal that posits: “What if Fruit Loops but more green?” The MOM Brand cereal is basically that; there’s no further gimmick other than the free download that comes in the box. This is the one instance where the Shrekification could have gone further. I hope I don’t regret saying that by the time we get to the next item!

We all know that waffles are a huge part of the Shrek universe. It makes sense, then, that there would be a crossover with Eggo and Pillsbury timed with the release of the sequels. Green ogre faces in the middle of a frozen waffle? Sure, I accept that, it makes sense. But a thick, almost creamy, neon green “swamp syrup” with no description of the taste other than a disclaimer of “artificial flavoring”? No, now we’ve gone too far.

While we as a society might continue to lust after Shrek and wish that some of these novelty treats were still easy to find, some things, like this verdant syrup, deserve to remain buried at the bottom of a swamp.